Smashing in the New Year with Hulk QC

John van der Luit-Drummond gets the lowdown from Barrister Hulk QC on all the big stories from January 2015

Happy New Year, Hulk. I trust you had a great holiday and are ready for your first interview of 2015?

GO AHEAD PUNY CHAMPAGNE-GUZZLING HUMAN.

What are your thoughts on lawyers teaming up with journalists over new RIPA proposals?

HULK SAY THE NEWSWIRE-REGURGITATING HACKS SHOULD PUT THEIR MONEY WHERE THEIR MOUTH IS AND SUE.

The government's Global Law Summit appears to have competition from a fringe event. Which summit will you be attending?

HULK AGREES WITH PETER OBORNE. MAGNA-CARTA-MINIMALISM IS NOT THE WAY TO RUN A LEGAL SYSTEM. CONSEQUENTLY, HULK WILL BE BOYCOTTING THE SMELLY-POLITICAN-SOAKED, OVERPAID-LACKY-FEST THAT IS THE 'IGNOBLE LAW SUMMIT'.

The Ministry of Justice (MoJ) plans to impose a blanket rise in court fees. Is this fee hike fair?

THEY'RE BOLLOCKS. ANOTHER GRAYLING MIND-SHUTDOWN WITH GRAVE CONSEQUENCES FOR THE LEGAL PROFESSION. BRING ON THE ELECTION.

I'm glad you mentioned the election, Hulk. Labour's law officers have recently called on all lawyers to vote for their party in the election. Who will you be voting for?

HULK WILL OBVIOUSLY BE VOTING GREEN.

Meanwhile, the Lord Chancellor has pushed ahead with his reforms for judicial review. Has he swayed you to his cause?

A QUESTION DRIPPING WITH SARCASM. HULK SOMETIMES WISHES GRAYLING USED SARCASM. IT MIGHT SUGGEST THAT HE HAD A BRAIN.

Grayling has also been back in the High Court over criminal legal aid duty contracts. What did you think of his arguments in court?

GRAYLING DOESN'T HAVE ARGUMENTS. JAMES EADIE QC SORTS THOSE OUT FOR HIM.

The CPS wants to be able to brief rape victims about what the defence intends to ask ahead of trial. Is this a good idea?

ANYTHING THE CPS CAN DO, THEY WILL SCREW UP.

Riverview Law have partnered with the University of Liverpool to leverage its artificial intelligence (AI) expertise. Are you worried about AI taking hold in law firms?

AH, SO MANY JOKES. 'ANY INTELLIGENCE WOULD BE WELCOME', 'LET'S NOT GET AHEAD OF OURSELVES', AND HULK'S FAVOURITE, 'COMPUTER SAYS BILL'.

Lord Woolf appears unrepentant over his support for the controversial Saatchi Bill. Is he right to deflect questions from lawyers as he has?

ANY BILL THAT HAS A PERSON'S NAME AS A LABEL IS STUPID AND DESERVES TO FAIL.

Speaking of labels, what did you think of more than 50 people trying to trade mark 'Je suis Charlie'?

HULK IS NOT CHARLIE. CHARLIE WAS RUDE JUST FOR THE SAKE OF IT. HULK SUPPORTS CHARLIE'S RIGHT TO MAKE A DICK OF HIMSELF, BUT HE'S STILL A DICK.

Finally, did you enjoy 'divorce day'?

HULKIE HAD SEVERAL QUCIKIES. IT WAS GREAT.

And I think we'll leave it there. Thanks again, Hulkie.

NICE BEARD. SJ

@BARRISTERHULK